Mark's Mailbag: Perfecting the Bowie Haircut

Mark, it’s been a while since anybody hit you up with some Q’s. Everybody out here in the internet is real bummed about the passing of David Bowie. There has been lots of coverage about his personas/characters over the years, and it seems from Facebook like lots of people enjoyed dressing up like him for Halloween. My question is this: if you had to incorporate one piece of the most notable Bowie costumes, from any era, in your everyday look for an entire month, what would it be?

Jack Reif, Valdosta, GA
Sent from my Android device

First, you had some serious punctuation in that last sentence. Second, you should really change your settings so that Android message doesn’t go out with all your emails. One thing I’ve observed while taking questions from strangers on the internet is that any question involving or relating to Facebook is ALWAYS sent from an Android device. No offense, though.

As for your question, I’m ruling out anything relating to Jareth the Goblin King from Labyrinth. Don’t feel good about sporting any of that.

There is one obvious piece of the Bowie costume that I could pull off with a modicum of effort - the hair.

Bowie had a red mullet as Ziggy Stardust, Aladdin Sane, and sorta when he was the Thin White Duke. Below is a photograph I had taken mid-haircut last year. If you are wondering, I did actually request that the haircut proceed from sides-to-back in order to have this mudflap for a brief moment. (Basically just long enough for the picture to be taken).

Behold the Redneck Flow

*True Story - I gained a follower on Instagram from an account dedicated to hockey mullets after posting that photo.

I would need some sort of straightening device, and the hair would need to be dyed bright red, but I definitely could pull this off. The red mullet from the Thin White Duke would require copious amounts of gel or some sort of chemical treatment on account of that curl situation I have going on, but I think it's the most do-able.

There will definitely be a number of tributes to David Bowie's music released over the coming weeks and months, but I don't think anyone will top the cover of "Sound and Vision" that Beck, his dad, and approximately 160 musicians made a couple years ago. Take ten minutes out of your day and watch this.

Mark is a former lawyer who lives in Nashville. If you see a guy who looks like this caricature walking a golden retriever in Germantown, feel free to say hi. You should know, however, that there is another guy who looks a lot like Mark who also walks a golden retriever in Germantown so you might be saying hi to the wrong dude. It has caused confusion in the past—including one particular incident where the other dude's wife hollered down the street at Mark several times before getting a closer look and realizing her mistake. Anyway, say hi. You can also find him on the internet at basketofchips.com and instagram.com/cmharrod.